Thursday, 31 August 2017

Four months of Rowan

Month four was the toughest month so far. Rowan's sleep was the worst it's been since we got him; childcare was next to non-existent as we'd pulled Joseph out of both nurseries, Granny had visitors and was poorly, then Ruari also went camping for three nights / four days... so it has been mostly me and the two boys finding our grooves / surviving!

Rowan went from doing anything from four up to eight-hour stretches of sleep at night to, instead, waking to feed every three hours - which I shouldn't complain about as I know others have it worse - but it was an exhausting shock to the system as I'd have little energy in the morning for Joseph. I'm hoping that's the four month sleep regression come early and that it's not going to get any worse.

Joseph and I started off well by doing crafts or painting each day and trying to avoid TV as much as possible, to accepting that the TV has to go on if I am to get myself washed and dressed / get Rowan down for his nap / keep on top of the laundry and housework / stay remotely sane. We did introduce a rule of not having it on before 9am though - and I've just started telling him that I'll get in trouble if he watches too much of it. I tend to just let him watch it whilst Rowan is feeding / napping and then sometimes again whilst I make dinner. Joseph doesn't sit there entirely like a couch potato though, well I guess he does for the most-part, but it's more there for comfort whilst he does puzzles (his current favourite thing to do) or builds things from Duplo it seems.

Rowan's been in his own room for a couple of weeks now. We had intended to keep him in with us 'til the six month mark, but we found he was waking at literally the crack of dawn because our room has no curtains or blinds, so we moved his cot bed into the spare room downstairs with a blackout blind and baby monitor, and I tend to sleep in the spare bed after the 3am feed. Until his official move to the spare room, all of his naps and his evening sleep had been in the carry cot but the transition to his cot bed has been surprisingly straightforward, though he still sleeps on his front, rendering the £120 Sleepyhead I bought redundant. Urgh.

Breastfeeding is now a breeze - something I never thought I'd be able to say. It's knackering at night and sometimes I get very disorientated as I doze off whilst sitting upright (I find feeding whilst laying down very uncomfortable and just prolongs the feed). I've not pumped at all lately - not even used my Nature Bond sucker pump - and as a result I only have three pouches of milk left in the freezer. We were finding that Rowan either didn't seem to need milk on the (very rare) occasions that I left him with Ruari, or he just wouldn't take the bottle so it'd go to waste either way.

Joseph has been somewhere between an angel and Joffrey Baratheon for most of the last month, so there has been tension between us at times. I try to keep my cool, but sometimes (most of the time) I lose it. He's had quite a few play dates which I've been pleased about as I was worried about him not having enough friends / ruining his life by pulling him out of his nurseries. We've also been to new places as a trio and our groove has become 'stay indoors in the morning whilst Rowan naps, have lunch then do something fun in the afternoon'... which usually involves stopping for a slice of cake or an ice lolly. There have been signs of jealousy where Joseph will ask me to put Rowan down, ask if it's time for his sleep, and he's even thrown things at him. But there has been more affection than jealousy; if Rowan makes the smallest sound on the monitor during his naps, Joseph wants to go in and see him immediately, he wants to get in his cot with him, wants to sit next to him on the sofa, get down from the table to see him at regular intervals whilst he eats his meals, tells anyone he meets about him. 

My favourite moment of this month was when we went to a show called 'Concerto Para Bebes' at bOing family festival in Canterbury just last weekend. We'd never been to anything like it before and I had no idea what to expect. It was aimed at 0-3 year-olds so I figured it was likely to be perfect for us, and it was. It's the kinda thing Joseph hates - people and noise - but it was done in such a way that he lost himself and was clapping and tapping his feet. When he noticed his foot moving, he said to me 'look mum, my feet are singing!' He held Rowan's hand for a large part of it and snuggled into us and sat his Batman toy down to watch too. I guess the closest thing to it that we have been to is Baby Sensory - the way there were mats laid down in the middle the audience sat around the edges - but it wasn't as interactive; we just watched the performers playing classical music with various instruments - some of whom were sat amongst the audience; the lights were down low and it was just lovely. Joseph said he loved it, and Rowan seemed mesmerised throughout too and fell asleep immediately after it ended.

Speaking of Baby Sensory; I've not taken Rowan to any baby groups. With Joseph I took him to loads, but Rowan loves his morning nap so much that there's no way we could get to one. Plus the funding at the SureStart groups has changed so that they're only on during term-time anyway so there haven't been any recently.

Oh, this month I finally got rid of Rowan's cradle cap; for three nights I smothered his head in Kokoso coconut oil 15 minutes before his bath, then during his bath I left his shampoo on his head for a few minutes before rinsing and rubbing with a soft sponge. Came off super easily, and without the use of any abrasive shampoos. Hurrah. 

Other successes this month include; Rowan can now suck his right thumb, though the way he holds it means that he often pokes himself in the eye and cries whilst doing it. He's rolled over a few times from front to back and once from back to front. This is a slight cheat as I got him weighed the day after his four month birthday but he was 15lb 15oz and still between the 50th and 75th centile line. We got some big laughs from Rowan this month; he particularly enjoys being bounced on a knee whilst said bouncer sings 'pop goes the weasel.' He loves looking at himself in the mirror and loves the fact that Joseph gets right up in his face whilst riding on his Buggy Board. Rowan still seems to be very interested when we eat and has become very dribbly boy. He now wears Joseph's old amber necklace around one of his feet and has been nomming on teething granules and teething bonjela as it seems as though he's being bothered by tooth ache, but who really knows! Jabs were a pain in the arse as they came at a time when Rowan was particularly whingey anyway. Urgh.

All in all, a pretty busy month and by having Joseph at home with me every day it has meant I've not been able to eat as much crap as I normally would and haven't been able to binge-watch anything, meaning that I've lost a few more pounds. I have eight more to lose 'til I'm back to my pre-pregnancy weight.

Until next month x

Saturday, 29 July 2017

Three months of Rowan

A.K.A. Ro-bo. (That seems to be the nickname we've settled on!)
The fourth trimester has come to an end and it was definitely the best. My heart feels like it will burst when I think about my two boys, and my mind seems to have erased any struggle with Rowan aside from with breastfeeding - mainly because he's been no struggle at all. He's just such a good boy and I feel so lucky. I've struggled more on the Joseph front, but mostly due to feelings of not being enough for him. Whereas with Rowan, he doesn't yet want for much apart from milk, sleep, a bit of social time and a clean bum.

I don't think I'll ever get over how great it is to have a baby that naps without needing to be held and I probably mentioned it in last month's post. I take his big morning nap for granted a bit now as it's my one-to-one time with Joseph and on days I don't have Joseph, it's a chance to tidy, clean and get ready. Or faff on the internet. The poor boy really needs a decent afternoon nap, but when I have Joseph I try to get us out of the house and Rowan isn't so great at napping when we're out. He cat naps but I know he's not getting the deep sleep he needs and can sometimes get a bit ratty. It is quite hard to balance the needs of both boys in a day, but it helps that Joseph is really loving toward Rowan still and is patient 99% of the time. Rowan's night-time sleeping still isn't great, but I know it's not as bad as it could be; we had a few six-hour stints and I think even an eight-hour one once, but we're now back to four hour intervals, generally speaking. I actually think his sleeping regressed after he caught his first cold and was waking up hourly/was just awake all the time, and it hasn't gone back to being as good as it was getting.

His bath and bed time routine is firmly in place now and I aim to give him his bed time feed at 7pm, once he's had his bath - which is sometimes with Joseph. Ruari usually puts Joseph to bed whilst I see to Rowan, but if Rowan goes to sleep quickly, or if Joseph is still sleep-fighting once Rowan is down, then I'll put Joseph to bed too which is a bit of a treat. I've been waking him up for a feed when I go to bed, so at around 11pm, just so that I get a solid block of sleep without worrying he'll wake up. But those four hours seem to go so quickly and that night time feed is tough. Luckily he's pretty efficient and we're only up for 30 minutes. He still sleeps on his front and is usually woken up by his nappy having leaked with pee as I guess they're not designed for front-sleeping. I think this could probably be helped by going up a nappy size. He's in size 3 at the mo.
Breastfeeding doesn't hurt at all now, though I'm pretty sure I narrowly escaped an encounter with thrush when I tried using reusable breast pads. (Stabby sensations in the breast and tender nips are not welcome here).

He's not been weighed in a while because he's always napping when HV clinics are running, but he is a beast so I'm not worried.

He's just had his second round of jabs and, like last time, he has been quite affected by them; constipated and more unsettled than usual. I'm hoping this will pass shortly.

We've put Joseph's old Hungry Caterpillar buggy toy on his bouncy chair and he seems so engaged with it. He really stares at all of the colours and seems to shout at it and tries to reach for it with his feet and tries to bat the dangly apple with his hands. I wonder if it's his nemesis!
We've been doing more tummy time with him lately which Joseph absolutely loves doing with him, or getting right up in his face opposite him whilst Rowan is doing it. He actually rolled over from his front to back the day he turned three months old, but it was probably a fluke - like the time Joseph sat up when he was four months old. Total fluke.

I've been getting as much wear as possible out of the watermelon long-sleeved vest that a friend bought for him as it's for 0-3 months and I've not been able to get hold of the next size. I'm pretty sure people think 'ugly girl' when they see him wearing it!

Rowan gives the biggest smiles when he sees me, Ruari or Joseph and he seems so close to laughing. He also stares so intently when any of us are eating and sometimes dribbles. He often starts barking at us when we're eating too. I wasn't sure if I was just imagining it but Ruari had noticed it too. He's not going to be touching food for another few months yet, though I'm a little worried that Joseph is going to try to share some of his food to keep him schtum!

He's been doing better in the car in the last couple of weeks; not sure if that's down to us trying to ensure there's nothing that can be bothering him, i.e. fed, winded, clean etc, or whether he's happier being in the front seat. Or both. We're going to try putting him in the back again soon because I hate sitting in the back seat when Ruari's driving!
Happy three months, my sweet Rowan x

Thursday, 27 July 2017

Toddler days out: Chessington World of Adventures

We went to Legoland back in April, just a few weeks before Rowan arrived, and I've been dying to recreate the magical day we had there, although the logistics are giving me a headache!
Many days out have become much more expensive now that Joseph has turned three; and with the summer holidays having arrived, there is no day of the week that is safe from the super-fast bigger-kids who are often just millimetres away from knocking Joseph over.... not to mention the queues! Now that Rowan is here, Ruari and I would have to take it in turns looking after him and riding on something with Joseph but the big kid in me wants to ride on everything with him; see his face and hold his hand when he gets scared!

One place I have been thinking of going to is Chessington World of Adventures. I have fond memories of my mum taking me there a number of times as a child as it was the closest theme park to our home, although I was quite a bit older than Joseph is now. I have looked into what there is available to do there for pre-schoolers, especially as Joseph is a shortie, and there is loads! If it's anything like Legoland, then the height-appropriate rides will be spread out around the park and there will be so many things to see on the way round that we'd probably not even get round to going on them all.

There are 17 rides and areas for kids who are 0.9 metres and below to explore, one being the Gruffalo River Ride where 'the world of the Gruffalo will magically unfold in front of your eyes with exciting twists and turns along the way'; which to me just sounds awesome and would be the one that Joseph will 100% want to go on more than once. (Joseph still talks about the submarine ride at Legoland whenever he finds his submarine toy buried amongst his other toys, bless him!)
What's also great about Chessington is that Organix 'Goodies' are available to buy at kiosks there in case your little explorer needs a pick-me-up. Joseph loves Goodies and we always have a little stash of their fruity bars and cinnamon popcorn in our snack cupboard as they're junk-free, organic and not as unhealthy as a chocolate bar or packet of crisps, although Joseph has been insisting on 'sharing' more of our Hula Hoops lately.

To help solve the ticket-price issue, you can get an adult or child ticket for free (worth up to £49) when you pay for one full priced ticket on the door (£45 for a child and £49 for an adult) so long as you bring along one of the coupons that can be found on special Gruffalo multi-packs of Organix Goodies, pictured below.
For a family of three (and a baby) like ours, this works out cheaper than buying three £28 earlybird tickets online in advance. The only tickets I can see that could be cheaper for us are the adult and pre-schooler tickets for under-5s, but these can only be used on selected dates and there are only two dates left in July (a bit too last-minute even for us) and none throughout the month of August. Under 3 year olds go in for free, btw.
Whilst 'Goodies' can't help the fact that Chessington is likely to be super-busy if you're visiting this summer, at least you know you can save some money on your tickets and keep your little ones' appetites at bay 'til dinnertime with their snacks along the way. And don't forget to say hello to the Gruffalo! I'm really hoping we'll get to see him there very soon!

Useful links to help you plan your day out:

P.S. Head over to my Instagram where I'm giving away a £10 bundle of Goodies snacks and a Gruffalo soft toy on the 29th of July :-) Good luck!

This post has been written in conjunction with Organix Goodies but is not a sponsored post... unless you count snack bars as sponsorship. I genuinely love Goodies and wish they made snacks for adults. I also am desperate to go back to Chessington but Rowan hates being in the car, so that's another issue!

Wednesday, 19 July 2017

Review (and ramble): Dinosaur train set

If you're the owner of a two or three year old, then my bets are on that they're dinosaur mad like Joseph and that you now know your Diplodocus from your Brachiosaurus and your Triceratops from your Styracosaurus... and perhaps you've even developed a small crush on Andy Day, amiright?!

For Joseph's second birthday we took him to Port Lympne Zoo as they'd just opened a dinosaur section called Dinosaur Forest where you can walk through the different parts of the Mesozoic era and read tons of facts* about the different dinosaurs that lived in each period in chronological order; it's pretty darn cool if you ask me, and definitely rekindled my own interest in dinosaurs. *if your child lets you stop for more than three seconds at each dinosaur!

Coincidentally, around the same time, another wildlife park near us also opened a dino section, though not as fact-filled as Port Lympne, Joseph loves to visit come rain or shine thanks to their soft play area; and we have probably visited at least once a month ever since. Joseph is now three and a quarter, so that's a lot of dinosaur hang-outs... and thankfully we have an annual pass to this place which doesn't cost too much of a bomb. On a side-note, is anyone else thinking that the manufacturers of those giant plastic dinosaurs have got to be raking it in at the mo as it seems like these dino parks are cropping up all over the place! They certainly seem to be all over my Instagram feed this summer at least!

Apologies; I digress! Joseph loves dinosaurs and so do I. So when we were given the opportunity to review the Dinosaur train set from Big Jigs Toys, I was very excited *ahem* for him. For me personally this would count as a 'big' present; something I'd give a child for a birthday or Christmas, or from a new sibling, due to it's physical size and the price being a penny shy of £50. Alas none of those occasions were close, so Joseph was just given it after nursery last week, which led to a very late bed time that night! I'm already a bit worried that he's becoming spoilt by his grandparents so I'm probably not helping my cause here!

The set comes with 49 wooden pieces which includes the track, a volcano bridge, a three-part magnetic train with interchangeable dinosaur passengers, track-side dinosaurs & dino babies, a pool of lava and trees that can form a scene.... or just be played with separately, as I spotted Joseph doing too. It develops dexterity, imagination, creativity, coordination, problem solving and teaches cause & effect; which is a lot of things all in one toy.

It's suitable from age 3+, but the track requires adult assembly... and you can't really just wing it if you want it to look like what's on the box. Luckily the instructions are easy enough for even someone such as myself to follow (I'm awful at interpreting instructions; I managed to assemble an Ikea Kallax incorrectly!) My only gripe isn't with the set itself, it's more with the destructive toddler who has no respect for how long it's taken you to put the set together and will quite happily pull it apart only to demand you rebuild it seconds later. Pfft!

What I particularly love about the set - aside from the dino train's little face - is that the railway is compatible with other train sets; we already had the Ikea one and also a brightly coloured one from ELC so if you want to go off piste and make a huge track then it's quite likely that you can do so with your existing wooden track if you have one. 

I am certain that any small child would be chuffed to own this train set; we've had it for just over a week and Joseph has been very excited to show it to all of the visitors we've had and he has played with it every day for at least 30 minutes, which is a win in my book. 

If the full set is out of your budget, then a four-piece dinosaur train is available to buy on it's own for £11.49 that you could likely use with your existing set, or the Ikea set. On the other hand, if you want to go whole-hog, a table-top dinosaur train set is also available for £124.99. (UK standard shipping costs £2.99 btw.) 

Whatever you end up buying; just make sure your child doesn't see the leaflet that shows all the other accessories and train sets Big Jigs have to offer because you'll never hear the end of it! I made that mistake and Joseph immediately had his beady eyes on the T-Rex tunnel, dino crane and the Bronto riser; I actually had to have words with him because he was acting a little ungrateful. After threats of taking it back to the shop, he soon piped down but at least I've now got Christmas sorted! Honestly, there's so much good stuff available on the Big Jigs site and even just in the railway section; you'll be desperate to spoil your child rotten :-)

This was not a sponsored post but we were kindly sent the dinosaur train set to review by Big Jigs toys as part of their Play Patrol.

Wednesday, 28 June 2017

Two months of Rowan

A.K.A. Robocop, Ro-bo Baggins, Ro-bo.

Rowan turns two months old today and memories are already starting to fade; things that I told myself I'd remember - too stubborn / stupid to write down in one of my 6,921 notebooks. For example, I can't quite remember which book I read to Joseph the night I went into labour. I think I know, but I'm not sure and it's annoying me. Urgh.

What I do know is... 
  • His first proper, not-just-wind, smile was during his six week health visitor check just as she'd asked whether he was smiling yet and I'd said 'no'. Ruari said he thought he'd seen one the day before but wasn't sure. But we're gonna go with his six-week birthday as the official date he smiled. 
  • Rowan will drink from a bottle, but prefers boob. My sister-in-law was super keen for us to make sure Rowan took a bottle as she had so much trouble because her little girl wouldn't take one, meaning she couldn't go out and leave her alone to do stuff. So I expressed some milk one morning and Ruari fed it to him. He looked so confused and although it took a while he eventually took 4oz. We gave it to him when he wasn't really due a feed as we didn't want him to be ravenous then get stressed out and worked up over a brand new experience and it seemed to pay off. He's now had a few bottles of expressed milk, but I'm yet to leave him for any amount of time that he'd need feeding by anyone else. I have a small freezer stash now though so I'm just waiting to be asked out! Ha! 
  • His favourite song is 'incy wincy spider'. To be fair, I've not sung many other songs to him, but when I do sing that one (and do the actions) it almost always earns a smile. Today it didn't because he'd had his jabs and was in an awful mood all day. Poor baby. 
  • I'm still convinced he's a more chill baby than Joseph was, and that it's not just a case of me finding it easier / being more relaxed second time around. 
  • He is now 12lb 1. I am still a stone heavier than my pre-preg weight. Meh. 
  • The last few nights he has slept for a six hour stretch, then will sleep for a few more after a feed. He has a big nap in the morning too but this often gets disrupted because, y'know, life. His favoured sleeping position is on his front... because he's a rebel. But I think it helps with his wind.
  • We've started doing a bath and bed time routine with him; and his bed time seems to naturally be around 8pm-ish. Though is sometimes later/earlier. We're definitely not as strict with it as we were with Joseph, but that's partly because he's breastfed from source, rather than from expressed milk as Joseph was so it's a bit harder to enforce, I think. 
  • Rowan's visited four beaches; Folkestone, Sandgate, Margate and Whitstable (nowhere exotic; and I'm not sure Folkestone and Sandgate really count as two different beaches!), has been to the zoo (Wingham Wildlife park) three times and has met the pigs at Badger's Hill. 
  • We've booked two holidays; one to Devon in September and one to Spain in October. Both with friends... who may not want to be friends with us anymore depending on how he behaves!
  • He's had his first set of jabs. They were horrible. He looked at me in the eye whilst squealing as if to say 'how could you do this to me, mum!'
  • He enjoys a bath now and seems to kick back and relax. I love it when his hands fall back into the water from his bath chair and his fists unclench.
  • Joseph still absolutely adores his brother; it is still just so heartwarming!

Happy two months, little one! x

Thursday, 1 June 2017

One month of Rowan

A.K.A. Rosie, Rosie-bear, Rosenthal, Rowan Tree, Rosenberg, Romany.

So*, it turned out that the last time I blogged, I was actually in early labour and I gave birth to a 7lb 10 Rowan around 7 hours after hitting 'publish'. Rowan has already been with us for over a month, and I feel pretty crap that my blog has been [insert zipped-up-mouth emoji here] despite best intentions, however, whenever I've tried to sit down to write his birth story, or any sort of blog post - including this post - it seems I get distracted by one thing or another (usually a baby or a toddler). I actually started writing this in time for his 4-week-aversary, but then didn't get round to finishing it. And now, here we are, late for his one-month-averysary too! But, better late than never, and I just wanted to get a few notes down otherwise I'll kick myself for not documenting anything and, apologies to anyone who might be reading, this post is all over the place due to having started writing it a week ago and things having changed since then!

[*I feel so Instagram-Stories by starting a sentence with the word 'so'!]


Rowan is generally a really chilled baby and doesn't cry much. I know it's early days and that could all change very quickly (according to Wonder Weeks he is due to start a 'Leap' tomorrow, meaning that he is entering his first mental development stage which could make him more clingy and unsettled*), but I can't help but compare this experience to mine with Joseph, and I'm certain we were already in the colic stage with by this point. I can't believe that I'm actually able to put him down in his bouncer and have a shower, and that Ruari's evenings aren't spent walking him around trying to get him to calm the f*** down. 

*For the record, he became grouchy the day I started writing this, so on the eve of his 4 week birthday. He has been clingier and generally less settled. Partly due to wind too so he's been having Gripe Water for the last few days and that does seem to have helped him get some of his wind up and out. 

Rowan's probably happiest when sleeping on me, or up high on Ruari's shoulder, but, unlike Joseph I am often able to transfer him successfully onto the sofa or his bouncer, or the spare bed downstairs in order to make dinner / spend time with Joseph / do housework. In fact the only place I don't seem able to transfer him into successfully is his cot. He loves being wrapped up and carried in our Solly Baby Wrap and he usually just falls asleep. I've done food shops and have just about managed to keep up with the laundry this way. Sometimes being in the wrap - and being so close to me - just makes him hungry though and I've ended up having to feed him in awkward places such as the Tesco's car park or the Sainsbury's loo.


Breastfeeding, on the whole, is going really well. I still need to use boob-loob - Lansinoh - otherwise it can be really uncomfortable. I still have about 5 seconds of discomfort upon latch, though this isn't every time, and my let down can be a bit pins and needles-y. My right boob is more uncomfortable than my left, which can sometimes be totally painless, but the pain levels are nothing compared to last time. By four weeks with Joseph I had made the decision - with incredibly heavy heart - to switch to expressing and using formula. I was so desperate to breast feed, but I just couldn't take the pain any longer - dreading every feed, not being able to hold Joseph in between feeds for the pain, and I just felt myself really spiralling. I'd lost a lot of my baby weight by then because I was just so stressed and emotional. This time around, however, I don't dread feeds; I actually look forward to relieving my boobs when they're feeling really full, and I don't think I have a chance of losing the remaining stone-and-a-half of baby weight without going on some sort of diet... and I hate diets. In Rowan's first week, we went to see a lactation consultant at a nearby breastfeeding group and she diagnosed a posterior tongue tie which could be snipped if he fails to gain weight and I keep getting Mastitis, but neither of those things have happened so we're just cracking on... Though Rowan has only been weighed twice since birth, the 2nd time he'd regained his birth weight and more, and he feels heavier and longer so I'm pretty sure we're doing ok.*

We got him weighed yesterday, and he is 10lb 4 and following the 50th centile line perfectly. Hurrah!


The night time situation is a little bit awkward. Rowan and I co-slept in the spare room downstairs so as not to disturb Ruari and Joseph for the first 10 days or so, but I started feeling really lonely and felt guilty for co-sleeping, so we moved upstairs to where we have the cot bed set up next to our bed. Sure enough, Joseph and Ruari have both been disturbed by Rowan being up there but Joseph seems to be getting better at filtering the crying out now and comes into our room in the mornings so excited to see Rowan (and poke him in the face). Rowan has slept in his Sleepyhead pod and handful of times, but we've not got as much use of it as I'd have liked to so far. We usually come up to bed at around 11.30pm and he will go in the pod until his next feed which is anywhere between 2am and 4am but will not settle back into it so usually ends up sleeping on his front, either in our bed between us, or more recently, on his front in his cot - without the Sleepyhead. Joseph used to like sleeping on his front too... I know it's not ideal according to the sleep recommendations, but he properly has his head facing to the side and there's nothing that can get in the way of his breathing, so... 

Your Face or Mine

Looks-wise, I think Rowan looks a lot like Joseph did, but much chubbier and with a different nose. It looks a little more Filipino. His eyelashes are starting to show now, whereas at first they were obscured by his puffy eye bags! His ears are different too. I am so interested to know how similar or different they are going to look as they get older. 

On a sidenote, Rowan makes a lot of the same noises that Joseph used to make; the snuffles, squeaks, sqwarks (can't think how to spell that word!), the baby sneezes and the almost-sneezes that are just weird shouts. He doesn't seem to startle as much as Joseph did, but is very head-bobby like Joseph was and makes the 'eh-eh-eh' sounds when trying to find the boob. So cute... and sometimes feels a little bit like I've been transported three years into the past.

Being a mum of two

I've actually only had a handful of days truly solo parenting both of the kids for the whole day whilst Ruari's been at work... and I've achieved the ultimate parenting goal of getting them both to nap at the same time, twice!
Rowan tends to nap in the mornings so it gives me some time with Joseph; playing with his Play Doh or the Duplo set that Rowan bought him upon his arrival (ahem), or just watching TV. This morning we made gingerbread biscuits (using a kit) though it was a little ambitious as Rowan woke up screaming and Joseph lost interest after the first batch, so I ended up finishing them one-handed. We try to go out in the afternoons, though Joseph's such a home-body that sometimes it's just easier to stay at home than force him to get ready and out of the door... then there's the risk of him falling asleep in the car, and as I can't let Rowan stay in his car seat for too long, we often end up just going to Granny's house where we can leave Joseph in the driveway but get Rowan in the house.

Joseph & Rowan

Joseph is so full of love and affection for Rowan; it really is the sweetest thing to observe. He says he loves him all the time; gives him kisses and 'hugs', which are really just little forehead-to-forehead touches. This morning when Rowan was crying, Joseph ran to get his 'medicine', the Gripe Water, and put Rowan's nappy in the bin after he'd been changed. Another time Rowan was crying in his bouncer, Joseph went up to him and said 'aww, poor Rowan', then shouted 'Mummy! He wants milk!!' He'll sometimes fetch things for me whilst I'm feeding; a muslin, my phone, my feeding cushion - sometimes when I've not even asked for them. If only he could fetch me some water! He found Rowan's back-up formula in a cupboard one day and often pulls it out just to say that it's Rowan's milk. He thinks it's funny that Rowan can't eat anything and he doesn't have any teeth yet, and often says 'Rowan can't eat this; he has no teeth'; then asks whether we have teeth about 50,862 times during a meal! Joseph is generally really patient with Rowan's crying, though it took a bit of getting used to in the beginning. He's got into the habit of singing 'Twinkle Twinkle' to him to try and help to settle him, which is adorable... though he's also picked up an alternative version called Twinkle Twinkle Chocolate Star and something about dad driving a rusty car. Joseph is so proud of him and loves telling people that he is a big brother. Of course there are awkward times when Joseph will start crying because Rowan is crying - sometimes fake, just for attention. He'll also want to kiss or prod him whilst he's sleeping and will incessantly bounce of the sofa next to me whilst I'm feeding, or climb on me, but overall he seems to have adjust really well. I hope the love continues!

Right, I can hear a Rowan waking up...

Ciao! x

Thursday, 27 April 2017

40 weeks pregnant: Could this be it?

I think every day is going to feel a bit like how I've felt today; thinking that it could be the last time I drink a coffee in relative peace, get a chance to have my eyebrows sorted, sleep in my bed without a newborn next to me; the last day of just the three of us.

I woke up at about 3 or 4am with period pain-like cramping; a little scared to move in case my waters had broken like last time. They hadn't, though, and eventually the cramping went away and I was able to catch a few more hours of sleep. Ruari had today off work, and after bringing me tea and a teacake in bed this morning (and a Joseph), I decided we needed to get Joseph's hair cut ASAP - so we booked an appointment for 10am.

Ruari had told Joseph yesterday that he'd take him swimming, so we went to the pool straight after the (apparently traumatic) hair cut (I just watched the boys this time), before heading to the shopping outlet for an eyebrow threading session for me and a play in the play park for Joseph, followed by Pizza Express for lunch.

All day, my stomach (uterus, rather) has been tightening and releasing, but not getting into a rhythm which makes me think it could be some time in the middle of the night or tomorrow. I just don't know as, after being induced last time around, I don't know what it feels like to go into natural labour or how much time you have before it escalates and you're at 1 minute contractions, 5 minutes apart. All I know is that I've passed a bit of blood and I'm getting this cramping and tightening, which are all signs that something is going to happen, according to what I've read. Not to mention that he feels soooo lowwwww dowwwwwnnn yet soooo farrrrr ouuuttttt.

Our childcare plans have had to change a little bit as Ruari's mum - who lives super close to the hospital - has had to fly to Ireland for a few days following the sudden, tragic and heart-breakingly sad death of one of her cousins who was one of the loveliest ladies you could have ever hoped to meet. So my brother (Oli) is going to stay at our house tonight so he can be with Joseph in case we need to go to the hospital in the night. We've taken the spare car seat out of Ruari's mum's car so Oli can bring Joseph to the hospital tomorrow if need be... or take him to nursery, as he's meant to be going there tomorrow. And I'm meant to be seeing my midwife tomorrow morning.

It's just so weird not knowing when it could be but having the distinct feeling it could be really soon... yet also not wanting to get my hopes up in case it's another 2 weeks. That being said; at least if today was our last day as a family of three, it has been pretty perfect.