Friday, 11 July 2014

Instagram vs. my reality

In preparation for Joseph's arrival, we turned Ruari's 'man cave' into a nursery. Good bye mould-green walls (that was the colour, they weren't actually mouldy... ok, maybe a bit) and dark furniture; Hello duck egg blue, white furniture with bright accessories.

I made a picture collage, put a nice light filter on it and bunged it on Instagram (an old account). Even I thought it looked nice, perhaps even Pinteresting. Despite only being about 75% finished and a bit of clutter that I'd hidden out of shot, I loved how bright and airy it was compared to the room it was before, and imagined I'd spend loads of time in there with Joseph playing on his play mat, nursing him using my special pillow and staring lovingly whilst he bounced away in his bear chair or slept in his cot. Oh and I imagined I'd change his nappy on his changing table.
Note that his bouncy bear chair and octopus are in this room.
The reality is:

I spend zero time in the nursery aside from 20 minutes before I put Joseph down to sleep for the night at 7pm. He currently sleeps in a carry cot, which was part of his travel system, slap bang in the middle of the room (where the octopus is in the above picture)... Something I never imagined he'd be doing (I thought he'd be straight in his big cot right away (oh no, but then the hell that was breastfeeding happened but that's another story.)) I'm not sure why he ended up sleeping in a carry cot, but it's something we're trying to remedy... If we succeed, I might blog about it.

I change Joseph's nappy on a changing mat on the floor in the living room. He freaking LOVES being on his changing mat in general, way more than the octopus that I wanted him to love the most. Maybe it's the memory foam, I dunno.

Joseph doesn't even nap in his room. In fact he cries when I take him in there during the day. He lasted about 20 minutes the other day (in which time I pumped and did an Insta-vid) when I'd transferred him from where he was already asleep, but when he woke up and realised where he was, he started crying.

The room is not bright any more because there is now a black out blind sheet behind the Venetian blind that was already up. I could take it down every morning and put it back up every night, but it's a big window, the velcro is awkward and I am lazy. Plus, as I say, we spend zero time in there during the day so it seems pointless. Although saying that, if it was light in the day then maybe Joseph wouldn't cry when I take him in there... I'll try it.

There are clothes everywhere.... busting out of the wardrobe, drawers and tins(?); clothes that are too small, just right for now, and too big. But then there are day time clothes, pyjamas, summer time clothes, winter time clothes, hats, socks... and I'm drowning in scratch mitts. They were once organised, but you know what it's like... (or maybe you don't because you actually put stuff away again once you've rummaged through a drawer looking for a top that fits, unlike me).

Toys, too. My new obsession for 'sensory' toys... literally piled up with all the lovely toys people bought us. And blankets... loads of blankets. Everywhere. 
Top right.. I tried to tidy... 
So the living room has basically turned into the nursery. That's where we spend all day together unless we go out. I have a 'pump station' underneath a lewd Nick Cave self portrait and I rest up against the nursing pillow (although I actually lean forward a bit so the milk doesn't go on my clothes), whilst Joseph hangs out on one of his 'entertainment systems' (I'm still talking about the octopus, bear chair and changing mat). We also have the sofa for those naps he likes to have on me, although today he had a good nap on the bear. 

Admittedly, the living room looks way worse than it usually does because I took all of the aforementioned clothes out of his nursery once I'd taken those photos with the intention to sort through them... and two days later, I still haven't finished. (Instead I insist on taking baby photos and hash-tagging them to death or pumping whilst blogging about the mess.)
I admit to filter usage on this one. Joseph's 'day' box.
This morning I put Joseph's daily essentials (a few select toys and changing stuff) in the 'Hungry Caterpillar' box by his octopus in an attempt to contain it a little, but the rest of the room... uhh... needs work.
My pump station... laptop, pump (obvs), sandwich bags, handbag and nail stuff.
I have loads of those filing blocks somehow (although only one is actually any good)
Filter used on this too as it was coming out really dark.
So, for some reason, I felt I needed to share the reality of the clutter and what it's actually like, for us, living with a small baby.... without filters. The whirlwind (I am probably the whirlwind, actually) that seems to turn our house upside down on a daily basis. And the fact that over 3 months later, the nursery is still only 75% finished.

Maybe one of these days I'll actually be as neat, clean and tidy as some of my friends whose houses genuinely do look as nice in real life as they do on Instagram, despite also having kids!
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Thank you so much for reading and taking the time to leave a comment. It really means a lot! Nicki x

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